Data Processing by our Brain

Olny srmat poelpe can raed tihs.

cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The
phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy:

it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!

Corporate Strategy

Due to the Current financial situation, our Management has decided to
implement a scheme to put all workers over 30 on early retirement.

This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged Personnel Early).
Personnel selected for RAPE can apply to our Management to be eligible
for the SHAFT scheme(Special Help After Retirement). Personnel who
have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW scheme
(Scheme for Retired Early Workers). A person may be RAPED Only once,
SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as Management deems
appropriate.

Personnel who have been RAPED can apply to the Vice President (Works)
to get AIDS (Additional Income for Disposed Personnel or Spouse) or
HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance).
Obviously, personnel who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or
SCREWED any further by management.

Person staying on will receive as much SHIT (Special High Intensity
Training) as possible. Management has always prided itself on the
amount of SHIT it gives its staff. Should you feel that you do not
receive enough SHIT, please bring it to the attention of your manager.
He has been trained to give you as much SHIT as you can handle.

- Vice President (also Head, RAPE)

A few Quotable Quotes

Plan Your Work so that you can Work Your Plan

Failing to Plan is Planning to Fail

The Art of Getting Things Done is to Know what Cannot be Done

The art of time management is to successfully tackle the Challenge of A Critical Few and the Trivial Many

Big People make you Feel Small but Great People make you Feel Tall

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